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Tuesday, 22 January 2008

Ambien or Lunesta?

Hey guys,
I did not do well with staying on track yesterday (Monday)
Why do I do this? I am so mad at myself right now. I do fine all day long, and then when it comes to the late evening I want to eat eat eat. I felt like I just got a handle on it the last 2 weeks. Well today is a new day and I WILL NOT stray off my menu today. I just can't.
It doesn't help that I can't sleep at night. I am usually up all night, I lay down about 5 - 6 am, sleep till about 11 am then I am up for the day and then it starts all over again. So doctor gave me Ambien to try - that did nothing. Then she gave me Lunesta and I was told that it "could" make me have a metallic taste in my mouth. Boy was that an UNDERSTATEMENT!! Within 10 mins of taking the pill I had that nasty taste in my mouth. I had it all night and all the next day. So the second night I thought I would put the little pill in a little bit of cheese and then swallow the cheese... thinking that the coating on the pill made it worse. WRONG!!
It did make me a me a little tired, BUT after the 3rd night I couldn't stand the taste another day!!! I had to stop. The taste is so bad it WILL make you want to stop taking it. I would rather stay up all night than take that nasty stuff! And drinking water, just made it worse.
Has anyone else experienced this problem?
It takes a lot to make me tired. I take 6 benedryl a day for my allergies and even that doesn't make me tired.
My goal today is to go to the mall and do some walking. I haven't done any exercising or walking since this cold weather started, and my body can really tell!

Sunday, 20 January 2008

Cold In Iowa!

Man has it been cold these past few days! Right now it is -4.6 degrees!! Brrr!! My sister lives in Sweetwater, Tenn & sge said it was cold at 43 degrees! I will take her 43 over our -4.6 anytime!! She only moved there about 6 months ago from Iowa! LOL How easily the old is forgotten!
Well I weighed in at JC yesterday and I lost another 1.3 lbs. Woo Hoooo! I am was so happy because I had gained about 10 lbs since mid November from a medication I was put on. WELL I said bye bye to that med and got back on track with no hesitation!!
It's great having my daughter back home! She had a phone interview with the place she applied with yesterday and then on Monday she goes in to listen to a call simulator. I hope she gets hired, it will be so good for her, plus she needs the money so badly.
Well I am off to watch a few youtube videos!

Wednesday, 16 January 2008

She is home!...

Hey everyone, Kelsey got home safe this last Friday, Although it's kind of bitter sweet. I was so happy to see her and have her home, but so sad and heart broken that they are so far apart from each other. They are so much in love
She is still trying to get over the 8 hour time difference and jet lag!!
I weighed in last Saturday, lost 2.3 pounds, was pretty pleased with that especially after the last 2 weight-ins I had gained !!
I will try to post more later!!
A Pass Due Update!

Wrote Monday, January 7th 2008 11:23 AM

Well I guess I should make some kind of update. Sorry it has been so long. I have been in a deep depression, with increasing anxiety, so I just haven't felt like updating at all.
My daughter finally agreed to come home. The main reason... so she can get the medical care she needs here in the United States. She will be arriving Jan 11th. I can't even tell you how happy and excited this makes me! She will live with us till she gets on her feet. She will get a job and save the money to work towards bringing her husband here. She is happy to be coming home, but extremely sad because she has to leave her love behind. This will be one of the hardest things she will have to do. She has grown and matured so much since she left Aug 1st. I can't wait to see her! Her birds and our cat will also be so glad to see her!
Ok time for an update about my weight. *sigh* It's been a real struggle just to stay and maintain my weight, and I didn't know why! I haven't been exercising, so I thought that was it. A few more weeks pass and a few more pounds were added. And it finally hit me. I was put on a new medicine for depression and anxiety in November and then the dose was increased the middle of December. So I looked this medication up online. I found out it can cause weight gain! O_O I shouldn't be surprised, I had heard of antidepressants causing weight gain, but I told myself... it can't actually MAKE you gain weight, it just increases your appetite, you would just have to watch what you ate. Well that maybe true, but for me it not only increased my appetite, I was obsessing over food! I HAD to have it NOW!! So I called my doctor and she took me off of it and wants me to start a different one. I don't know what to do. I am already taking Wellbutrin, and it doesn't cause weight gain, but obviously, it wasn't doing the job by itself, so I am a little afraid of starting any other medications cause I don't want to gain anymore. When I started this new medicine in Nov I was 134 and when I weighed this morning I was 144! But on the other hand I want to feel good. Before this new medicine my anxiety was through the roof. Oh yeah, the medicine I was put on that I gained weight with was Remeron.
An update on my cat, Tuesday. So far she is holding her own. When her antibiotics run out... a week later she starts getting sick, doesn't eat a lot. So I just keep them on hand for her. I know the day will come when antibiotics will not help anymore. I will cross that bridge when I get to it. Kelsey is so afraid Tuesday will die before she gets home. With that I will leave you with this video of my beautiful baby. If you view it on my youtube page the images don't look so stretched out! Just double click on it. If you haven't already seen this please rate and make sure you leave Tuesday a comment! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vILo2QKFXr4

Sunday, 04 November 2007

Heavy Heart...

I talked to my daughter tonight. She is still not feeling good. She is starting to run a low grade temperature and again the pain is growing. She said she feels sick to her stomach and dizzy. I told her she needs to drink, because of the kidney infection and to help flush the kidney stones out. But she said she can't that it makes her sick. Her husband is away on a two day business trip for his work, he gets back tomorrow night.

When she was in the hospital the Doctor there told her she needs to come back to the United States to receive the urgent medical care she needs from her Urologist at the Mayo Clinic. She refuses! She won't come back home unless she can bring her husband with her. Well that isn't possible, because he is not a resident of the US. She can come back home and file for a Immigrant Visa for a Spouse but I have heard that there is a waiting list of 4-6 years, and that is not to say he will be approved to come here. And part of the requirement to file for a Immigrant Visa for a Spouse is she would need to show evidence of financial support, or if she couldn't she would have to have someone willing to sponsor him. Here is the thing. My daughter was born with a lot of physical disabilities, has been on SSI disability since she was 7 years old. So she has never worked. So for her to come back to home and work would be almost impossible. She has asked her dad and I if we would be willing to sponsor him. For me, my answer would be YES in a heart beat, but I am not working... for her dad, absolutely NOT. I am so torn... My daughter is mad and upset that no one will sign a Affidavits of support for him to come here. No one is willing, and I can understand that totally. But it makes me feel completely hopeless and I feel like a failure as a mother. I need to get my daughter back here so she can get the vial health care that she so desperately needs. I am afraid she will die over there before she gets back home. He wants to send her home, but she won't come without him.

I am going to call her urologist at the Mayo Clinic on Monday to fill him on everything that has been happening and what treatment she has received already. Maybe he can offer some kind of advise or maybe hopefully he will be willing to call the doctor that is treating her in Jordan. Problem is... the doctor in Jordan speaks very little english.

I am sorry if any of this doesn't make any sense.... I am just going out of my mind.... I am so worried about her, I can't sleep, I can't function. I am depressed. I don't know what I am going to do.